Camping Can Be Criminal#5: Rob Brunet, Ryan Aldred & Steve Steinbock

I chose to publish this today because my EQMM buddy, Steve Steinbock, got his “What I’m Working on Now” column published at Sleuthsayers. Yay, Steve!

We’re heading into the August long weekend in Canada. Perfect camping time, should you choose to do that kind of thing. I don’t, but my friends do.

I’ve already waxed eloquent about Rob Brunet, the up-and-coming mystery writer whose first novel, Stinking Rich, will debut September 8th. His short stories will appear in Ellery Queen, as well as just about every other mystery magazine, and is just an all-around good guy. Bought a round of drinks at Bloody Words 2014, too (I don’t drink much, but I admired his generosity). Check him out:

The smell of a tent is distinct. The vinyl (?) bottoms of the new ones vs. the canvas of old. True dark when the fire burns low. Super bright stars. What’s on the ground? Bare rock, pine needles, well-worn hard-packed earth. Crickets or frogs at night. Birds in the morning. The smell of the fire. Coffee that you wouldn’t touch in the city but sooo good in the bush. God, I miss it.

Ryan Aldred is an interesting guy. I met him at Bloody Words as well, at our banquet table of young, hungry writers, and he was the first person to seriously suggest joining Reddit. He started the Bar on a Beach mystery series, with its inaugural novel, Rum Luck.

Cicadas in the treetops on a hot day. Clothes that smell like wood smoke for days afterward. Three feet of warmth at the top of a Canadian shield lake and the fifty feet of inky cold beneath. Looking up in the sky and seeing hundreds of thousands of stars. The whoosh and sizzle of a marshmallow catching fire. Moths the size of your palm bumping into the globe of a lantern. Haunting loon song as you fall asleep at night. Beads of moisture running down the outside of the tent after a morning dew.

Like what you read? Both Rob and Ryan will read at Noir at the Bar in Toronto on August 20th, along with the always-intriguing Tanis Mallow.

I’m working on today, but I would have liked to see the sold-out Majinx tribute to Houdini at l’Orignal Jail. I might still see if I can sneak by.

You see how I did that? Turning a holiday weekend into a hotbed of criminal writers and performers? You’re welcome.

What I’m Working On Now: Hope, Noir & My First #Walkcast [#MyWritingProcess Blog Tour]

First up, props to Rob Brunet. I first got to know him because a contact at Ellery Queen mentioned he’d sold a story to the magazine, so I Tweeted a hi and congratulations, and Rob was like, “Uh, hi. So…who are you and how did you know that?” Only much more polite, because Rob and I are Canadian, yo.

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Rob, a.k.a. Canada’s Carl Hiassen, will launch his debut novel, Stinking Rich, in September. Meanwhile, he’s beavering away at the sequel, Ka-boom, “a story about a bible camp gone bad.” Love it. Read more about him and his process here.
Rob tagged me in What I’m Working On, a writing blog tour where we each answer four questions:

What am I working on?
I’m mostly wearing my mystery hat right now. I was invited to submit to two anthologies, Jewish Noir and Montreal Noir, so I just finished two Hope Sze medical mystery stories for them. And I’m 12,000 words into Stockholm Syndrome, the fourth Hope Sze book, but first, I want to finish editing a fun cozy mystery, The Goa Yoga School of Slayers.

Early cover which will need fixing. Feel free to critique.

Early cover which will need fixing. Feel free to critique.

Non-fiction-wise, I should polish the next collection of Unfeeling Doctor medical humour essays, Breaking Bones.

breaking bones cover

We just finished editing the audiobook for The Most Unfeeling Doctor in the World, which I hope to distribute on ACX. And I just started doing walkcasts (walking podcasts), thanks to Michael La Ronn. So. Bref (as the French would say), I’m juggling a few different balls in the air.

My first #walkcast is about multitasking: Secrets of Highly Efficient Writers Tip #1: Make Writing a Habit. We’re called the Creative Doctor & Dog because I generally walk with our dog, Roxy. Anastasia appears in later walkcasts too.

My first #walkcast is about multitasking: Secrets of Highly Efficient Writers Tip #1: Make Writing a Habit. We’re called the Creative Doctor & Dog because I generally walk with our dog, Roxy. Anastasia appears in later walkcasts too. This is a photo of a different doctor & dog, by David Mark.


How does my work differ from others in the same genre?
I’m such an oddball, I don’t worry about sounding the same as everyone else. But I like to make jokes, and I’ve been told I’m very direct, maybe not at the same time. For example, when I wrote about a patient giving birth and passing stool, my editor commented, “Is this necessary?” I was just like, “It happens.” I call ’em as I see ’em, which is part of the reason not everyone gets my writing. But when they do, heaven.

Why do I write what I do?

For fun. Or profit. Or both. If I’ve had a bad ER shift, it helps to write about it, even if I never publish it. Fantasy, science fiction, children’s books, and YA are even more of an escape. Mystery means delving into the worst of human nature, but also seeking justice. And who doesn’t need a little more romance in life? So I just kind of spin from one thing to the other, which amuses my hummingbird brain, but does add to the chaos.

How does my writing process work?
My rule of thumb is that I do 500 words a day if I’m working in the emerg, 1000 words a day if I’m not working. Small but consistent goals. I like to wake up and write right away, before working in the ER and/or before my kids wake up. Then I can relax because I feel like I’ve done my homework. Otherwise, it weighs on me. My kids are like, “Mommy, I’m a train,” and I’m like, “I haven’t even broken 200 yet! Go play by yourselves!” But if I’ve done my words, I’ll say, “Choo choo.” I do try and get one day a week to myself to write and do yoga, which means that I rely heavily on our babysitter, Aly.

Thanks to Rob for tagging me. Next, I’ll pass the baton to Steve Steinbock, the Jury Box reviewer at Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine who introduced me to Rob and invited me to Bloody Words. See? Full circle. Take it away, Steve.

Rob Brunet & Steve Steinbock, eager to tell you about their writing process.

Rob Brunet & Steve Steinbock, eager to tell you about their writing process.

Five Ways to Kickstart Your Writing Imagination with a Mystery Con: Bloody Words, Part II

1. Dare to Be Stupid

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Click on the pic to buy Terminally Ill from this crazy-looking chick.

I’ve never looked good in a surgical cap, whether it’s the guy’s kind or the poofy, blue, disposable women’s version. So why am I wearing a surgical cap, plus a giant poster of my book?

Well, at Bloody Words 2014, Canada’s mystery convention, they invited any recently-published author to join in a literary fashion show. They’d make a placard of your book cover. Caro Soles, an experienced fashion commentator, would describe your book in couturier terms while you sashayed down the sidewalk, wearing a hat appropriate to your book.

For the first time in my life, I Googled “how to walk like a model.” My favourite tips came from Chita Johnson: http://www.ehow.com/video_4404657_step-onto-runway-like-model.html: Step on to the ramp with your outside leg up, to block the audience’s view of your crotch. Who knew? I also mastered the half-turn and the fade, and learned the full turn.

Photo courtesy of Lisa. Note Michael Jecks, the international guest of honour, in the background. He's now my friend on Twitter, but be warned. Don't argue with the man about sheep.

No evidence of my modelling savvy in this photo courtesy of Lisa de Nikolits.

I also got to hang out backstage with Cathy Spencer, who won the Bony Blythe award the next day; Edgar award-winning author Wendy Hornsby, the Bony Pete award-winner, RJ Harlick; and the very sweet IPPY award-winner Lisa de Nikolits, who calls everyone “love.” Lisa explained how the cover art for her book, The Witchdoctor’s Bones, was created by a homeless, schizophrenic, now deceased South African man.

Arthur Ellis award-winner Melodie Campbell pulled a toy gun out for her turn on the catwalk, and someone else “shot” her at the end. Cool.

When I poised on the end of the runway, I pulled a syringe out of my top, and pretended to spray it in the air. I wanted to fill it with water, but didn’t have time. If I’d wanted to go all out, I would have used fake blood, but the cleaning staff wouldn’t have thanked me.

Look, I even included a blurry picture of myself with an apparent double nose.

Look, I even included a blurry picture of myself with an apparent double nose. I’m not proud.

Note Michael Jecks, the international guest of honour, wearing his book cover with the green background. He’s now my friend on Twitter, but be warned. Don’t argue with the man about sheep.

So get out of the house and try something different, even if you look silly. That’ll get your writing juices flowing. Even if all you write is, “I hate that doctor-writer who told me it was a good idea to dress up like a parsnip!”

2. Do the Group Thing
I was on a panel on the Sunday called The Science of Murder. The moderator was Alex Brett, author of the Maggie O’Brien mysteries. The two other authors specialized in infectious diseases. Jen J. Danna writes about forensic anthropology with her co-author, Ann Vanderlaan, and was an intelligent, polished speaker. Dr. Ross Pennie, who recently released the latest Dr. Zol Szabo mystery, introduced himself as Canada’s leading expert on flesh-eating disease.

Me, Ross, Jen, and Alex's arm.

Me, Jen, Ross, and Alex’s arm. Photo courtesy of Steve Steinbock.

So that left me to joke that I was Canada’s second most knowledgeable doctor on flesh-eating disease. I’m totally not. But hanging around with other articulate people took the pressure off of me, and afterward, one aspiring author told me that it was her favourite panel, and that I had “a lot of moxie.”

Who wouldn't love a group like this? Photo by David Mark

Who wouldn’t love a group like this? Photo by David Mark

Groups can be good. Critique groups get a lot of bad press because they can suppress your writing voice, but it’s a good idea to find some camaraderie. Writing is lonely.

Small groups are good. This is Rebecca Senese, a talented writer of horror, science fiction, and mystery

Small groups are good too. This is Rebecca Senese, a talented writer of horror, science fiction, and mystery, all at once.

3. Dress Up Like Somebody Else
IMG_2430 IMG_2437 IMG_2436 We were supposed to dress up like our favourite mystery character for the banquet. I’d bought a lovely blue, dropped-waist dress from Melow at the latest Braderie de Mode quebecoise. Actually, my friend Danielle and I bought the same dress, which is quite hilarious because she’s almost six feet tall, and I am…not. At the last second, I found a peacock fascinator that I’d forgotten I’d bought on Etsy. IMG_2442 Anyhoo, it looked like a flapper dress to me, so I decided that I would be Harriet Vane.

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There’s an art to taking selfies. I obviously need more practice.

When Steve Steinbock greeted me, he said, “If I see Lord Peter Wimsey, I will send him my regards.”

I found my husband! Lord Peter Wimsey, showing off our family crest. Photo courtesy of his manservant, Bunter.

I found my husband! Lord Peter Wimsey, showing off our family crest. Photo courtesy of his manservant, Bunter.

Steve reading aloud for the Hammett awards (see statue in front of him).

Steve reading aloud for the Hammett awards (see statue in front of him).

Steve also tried on a new outfit. I think he looks very fetching.

Ken Wishnia looks pretty good, too.

Ken Wishnia looks pretty good, too. Look, their feet match. Must’ve done the modelling videos.

4. Give yourself a deadline.

Our panel was scheduled to run at the same time as “Bloody Idol,” the show where anyone could submit 250 words and read them aloud to a panel of editors and agents.
So, 1) I was pretty sure no one would come to our science panel, and 2) I wouldn’t get to check out Bloody Idol. But I wrote 250 words anyway, which forced me to start writing the fourth Hope Sze novel, Stockholm Syndrome.

My roommate, Merrill Young, generously offered to report back on the response. She and writer/editor/mothership Cheryl Freedman told me that all four editors and agents liked it, so eight thumbs up.

I will include that opening in my next newsletter. <incentive to join> <incentive to join> <just go to the bottom of the page> (In addition to SEO optimization, I’ve been reading about getting people to sign up for newsletters. It’s the next big thang.)

Then I was invited to submit to two anthologies. So now my writing cup overfloweth.

5. Get out of the con.

I made time for an hour of hot power yoga at Yoga Tree. IMG_2410 I walked the streets of Toronto. IMG_2411 S.G. Wong and I headed to “Kill like a Scandinavian” at the Toronto Public Library. Woo hop! Sometimes, you just need to get away. Now go forth and create.

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For readers’ convenience, a link to the “entertaining and insightful” Terminally Ill is provided by clicking on this photo.

P.S. For anyone who’s wondering, did I sell any books?
Yippers. Not a ton. Eleven paperbacks, to be exact. But that’s more than I would have sold if I hadn’t come at all.
More sales may come later (autocorrect changed that to latex. Yes, I’m pretty sure latex will always outsell my books).

And if I sell to both anthologies that asked me to submit, I’ll make back my money, even without the book sales.

I keep having to fight my own cheapness. I get all bent out of shape over printing up my own postcards.

Meanwhile, one of the other authors, Ryan Aldred, said that he’d like to throw $1000 each at different promotions. Reddit, Google Ad words, Facebook. Just experiment.

My jaw dropped. I’m thinking too small. I don’t take a lot of risk, but I lose the reward, as well. I’ve read that it’s typical of women, to save and hoard expertly, but never take the big leaps that will let them level up.

I’m used to toiling in garrets. That’s how I became a doctor and a writer, after all. But sometimes you’ve got to bust out, get crazy, and make wild new friends. Done, done, and done. Now I just have to write some more.

Ellery Queen, I love you. Thanks for reviewing TERMINALLY ILL. Plus, the new Hope Sze novella!

Kris Rusch sent me an e-mail titled “Good review.”

Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine reviewed Terminally Ill in its July issue. Kris said it was too long to type in, but had a good pull quote.

I liked the sound of too long. Better than a one-liner. I downloaded the July version, stat.

Melissa Yi, Terminally Ill, Olo Books, $17.99. Publicity-seeking magician Elvis Serratore, in tribute to Houdini’s visit to Montreal nearly ninety years earlier, allows himself to be chained inside a coffin and dropped into the St. Lawrence River. When the escape fails, Montreal medical resident Hope Sze is able to resuscitate him. Against physicians’ recommendations, the magician prepares for an encore, but wants Dr. Sze, with her reputation for solving crimes, to find out if someone wants him dead. Narrating in a sprightly style while sharing some of the nitty-gritty of a resident’s job, Hope Sze is an utterly likeable character.

I found the pull quote and highlighted it for you! You’re welcome.

If you got anything out of this post, join the team. Buy my book(s)!

Click to buy. You know you want to. And if you already bought, mwah!

I’m officially in love with the reviewer, Steve Steinbock, who also wrote in the intro, “The best of crime fiction—of any fiction—transports us to times or places different from our own while touching something familiar in us. All of the titles in this month’s column accomplish this in one way or another.”

Hmm. Wonder if I can use that, too.

The other authors he reviewed include Isabel Allende. Um, hi, Isabel. Excuse me while I faint.

I know the haters out there are like, Big whoop, so I’m just going to explain why I’m tooting my own horn. Again. And I still have some toots left over, so bear with me.

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Haters, why don’t you resent this seagull instead? It’s much braggier than me. Photo by Pixabay.

EQMM is the longest-running mystery magazine in the world, founded in 1941. Stephen King declared Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine “the best mystery magazine in the world, bar none.” Dorothy Parker was a fan, okay?

From a business point of view, gaebler.com estimates EQMM’s circulation as 180,000. According to its own reader survey, more than 70% of EQMM readers buy books by the authors they first read in this magazine’s pages. Half of their readers devour more than 15 mystery novels every year.

So. I could pay Bookbub $1550 to advertise Terminally Ill at an over-$2 price. Or I could target 180,000 people who already like mysteries enough to subscribe to the premier mystery magazine. (Or both, but I’ll let you know if that happens.)

Plus, now I have a pull quote that spans the series, since it praises the character instead of one book. However, I’m still pushing Publishers Weekly’s “entertaining and insightful” as hard as I can. Which isn’t very hard. It’s on the book cover and the online blurbs.

I can’t say enough good things about EQMM. Not only has the editor, Janet Hutchings, always written me kind rejection letters, but they recently reviewed my story, “Because,” calling it an “experimental short-short” and the Fiction River: Crime anthology that published it “high quality throughout.”

Best of all, Ellery Queen bought one of my short stories, “Om.” So even if readers skip past both reviews, at some point, their eyes might land on my yoga murder story, and I hope to sell EQMM many more. Short stories can be gold like that, as Mark Leslie Lefebvre and I talked about in our Kobo podcast here.

Mark Leslie Lefebvre, unable to conduct a podcast interview because he's too busy being resuscitated as Elvis Serratore, the escape artist from Terminally Ill

Mark Leslie Lefebvre, unable to conduct a podcast interview because he’s too busy being resuscitated as Elvis Serratore, the escape artist from Terminally Ill. Photo by Margaret Caldbick of the Glengarry News.

Kris herself pointed out in her Business Rusch series, “Instead of paying $500 to buy an ad in a magazine that people might or might not pay attention to, the writer is getting paid $500 to publish a story in that magazine. The reader will look at the story longer even if the reader doesn’t read the story than if the writer had an ad in that magazine.”

Also, EQMM sent me a Christmas card. I freaked out when I got that. They paid me for a story, and they’re sending me a Christmas card in an gold-rimmed envelope? #livingthedream

Anyway, I just revived myself with smelling salts. Excuse me while I plotz. That’s Yiddish. I gotta practice because I’m heading to Bloody Words 2014 June 6-8th, and Steve Steinbock (yes, the very same Steve Steinbock. I’m swimming with the big leagues now) has challenged me to a Yiddish cursing contest.

One last cool thing. I Facebooked Steve a thank you and mentioned that Kris Rusch had tipped me off. He wrote back, “I have some of her books. I’ll have to give them a read.”

Wait a minute. I might help out an Edgar Award nominee?

The world is a crazy place. But I just love it sometimes.

While you’re waiting for the next Hope Sze novel, a brand new Hope Sze novella, Student Body, will appear in e-book imminently, at a temporarily low, low price before its official paperback book launch. I’ll announce it in my newsletter first. Here’s the cover:

Student body POD cover.indd

Student body EBOOk coverStudent body EBOOk cover

P.S. To my two Melissa Yin fans: I just finished the second draft of The Goa Yoga School of Slayers, the sequel to The Italian School for Assassins (with thanks to Italian writer Barbara G. Tarn for editing my dreadful Google translate Italian), so stay tuned for another silly, lighthearted mystery cozy!

[Note: Review copyright 2014 by Steve Steinbock. Have I mentioned Steve? Steeeeeve.]